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Literature Text
When life brings you down,
You may want to drown.
Life is hard,
With hidden bits of hope.
I can't calm down,
I can't look up,
And I feel like I keep falling.
No fear,
No pain,
For that's what people want,
But that's not what we need.
Bring on the fear and pain,
Before I go completely insane.
It will make us stronger,
It will make us wiser.
It will help us through the shadows.
We are lucky enough,
To have friends who care so much.
They ask nothing in return,
Yet give us their lives.
When you go to the knives,
They take away every scar,
With kind loving words,
That will bring you back down to earth.
When you're sad and alone,
Just look to a star.
For even though it seems far,
It still shines through the night.
It will take your pain,
And share its love.
It will comfort those alone,
And guide those who are lost.
Things really do seem unfair,
Because they are.
I wish I only knew,
How to give you a hug too.
I know things seem bad,
But someone always has it worse.
And so just find that small simple smile,
And bring everyone to the truth.
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Comments28
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There is nothing that I dislike, but I especially like your use of commas as it forces the reader to slow down the reading...absorb a line before proceeding to the next. I am not sure whether this was intentional, but it influences the reading to such an extent that I actually read the poem again because in everyday language so many commas would not be used. The syntactical foregrounding technique therefore adds to the interpretation (on a subjective level). On a deeper level the content resonates with a great number of people I think, and the hugs are especially for you and to let you know that you are super special and not to forget it 
